Coffin (Addiction Poem)

I’ve met so many souls,

On this journey of mine,

Runnin round the streets,

You meet people time to time. 

Throughout the years I’ve seen so many faces,

Sets of eyes I’ll keep close to my heart,

Whether I knew them for a day or a dollar,

They all left their undeniable mark. 

Cause every now and then,

When you looked someone in the eyes,

You saw a mirror of yourself,

That cut through to the inside. 

It’s like the drug induced haze,

Subsides for just a second,

And you can see your life,

Through someone else’s perception. 

And at the time you never knew,

Why their eyes brought out the truth,

But it’s when you saw that pain,

You recognized a piece of you.

This used to happen all the time,

And I never fucking liked it,

Cause if you showed me myself,

That meant I had to fight it. 

I didn’t wanna see my truth,

Because my life was suffocating,

But if I could stay numb enough,

I could pretend I wasn’t fading. 

But in the end I faced that pain,

Dug my nails in and got clean,

Because the death of staying numb,

Was gonna me the death of me

So I sit here and I think,

What’s the difference between them and me?

Why did I survive,

while they succumbed to this disease?

Oftentimes you learn,

That most of those faces will die,

These little glimpses of your soul,

Just couldn’t survive the life. 

Over the years you bury more,

Kids who couldn’t come clean,

And the whole time you’re thinking,

“That could’ve, should’ve been me.”

You hear all the people say,

“I don’t get it, it’s a shame”,

But when that body was a person,

They were never there for them. 

They never truly knew that soul,

But now they cry over their casket,

And everyone talks in whispers,

While no one dares to say “addict“. 

They ignore the disease,

That’s why so many stay sick,

Because while you pretend it’s nothing,

There’s a fucking epidemic

We each have our struggle,

And I work hard to stay clean,

Because I know on any given day,

That coffin could’ve been for me. 

by Ashley Hebner

© All Rights Reserved 2016

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